Dinner in the Rain

I am so grateful to Paris for so many things, but one that seems to run through my life every day is that Paris really reminded me how to live. When Morgan and I got back from Paris last year, it really had a lingering effect on us. It wasn't the first time I had been to Paris, but it was really the first time I had lived in Paris.

So how does all of this translate into dinner in the rain? I was walking home from French class tonight after stopping off to buy some vegetables for dinner when my phone rang. I had forgotten my friends had invited me out for dinner tonight in Grant park. They were at the bar waiting for me, so I walked over with my groceries just as they were being seated. It was a beautiful table at the Park Grill, a beautiful new restaurant just below The Bean off of Michigan Avenue.

We ordered some French wine and some delicious food when we realized everyone around us was getting up from their tables, all at once. There was a storm coming in and I guess everyone felt that it was better to head to tables inside the restaurant. We were under a huge umbrella and once the rain started coming down in sheets, we realized not only were we protected by the umbrella, but we had a beautiful view of the Chicago skyline and the lightning show that was getting underway.

We had an amazing dinner, talking about each of our upcoming trips to Paris and everything that was going on in our lives. It was one of those great evenings when we talked and laughed and watched the rain come down. As the rain began, we had turned our chairs to all face the skyline as we ate dinner and it was then that we realized we had done just what we would do in Paris. In so many of the cafés there, all the chairs face outward. People don't sit across from each other as much as they sit next to each other and watch the world go by, enjoying each other's company, and perhaps a view of the Eiffel Tower in the distance.

By the time we were finished with the wine and the cheese and the delicious salads, we were pretty much the only ones left. We chatted with our server who seemed to have as much fun watching us eat in a torrential downpour as we were having dining in it. The rain eventually passed and the clear night was as beautiful as it had been in the downpour.

It's times like this when I realize that the difference between a rich wonderful life and one that is much less satisfying is the little decisions we make every day. When I got the phone call from my friend, I was loaded down with groceries and half way home on my two mile walk. I could have just as easily said I was tired and needed to get the food home, but I decided that the food would keep and time with my friends would be just as relaxing as going home. But it was so much more than that.

Being able to sit there in the rain and enjoy a perspective on the city's beautiful architecture, all the time talking and laughing and living... well it is the little decisions that we make dozens of times a day that make all the difference.

Another of the decisions I've made is that I need to focus more on the subject matter that brings me the most joy in my life. Creating my beautiful nude images fills me with inspiration that I've missed. It's been good to find the place in me again. It's the thing that makes me feel the most alive that I do.

These are the first images from the beautiful model Frances who I had the pleasure to photograph a few weeks ago. She's a kindred spirit and her beauty is more than skin deep. It was a wonderful day of exploring and experimenting and living our art. It's been a while since I've photographed someone who I had such a deep connection with. As I mentioned in a previous entry, my best work is when I collaborate with someone I share a mental connection with as much as I am inspired by her physical beauty.

Yes, Paris has reminded me what it is like to truly live. I wake up and try to remember that as I'm faced with the dozens of tiny little decisions I will make in the course of the day that make all the difference between living and simply passing the time while I'm here. Creating these images of Frances is proof of my living.

What Makes It Art?

Today I'm in the process of going through more than 700 photographs today from yesterday's shoot with Melissa and Elizabeth. As I'm going through the initial editing process, just over the top of my computer monitor I can see my classic art images rotating on a large electronic picture frame. They are beautiful images. I wonder if what I created yesterday will end up on that frame. Are they art?

There are many wonderful things going on in my photography world. I am continually grateful for the level of recent interest in my work from people who really understand the art world. Clearly what I believe in, and what I am creating with my photography is not only inspiring to me, but to many others as well.

The only frustration that I seem to be having these days is finding collaborators to continue to create my art with me. This morning, in the Sunday New York Times, there was an article about the muses of several great artists including Picasso, Klimt and Modigliani. And a book I just finished called "We'll Always Have Paris," devotes a large section to Man Ray and his muses. He has been a particular inspiration to me in my work. I have been fortunate over many periods in my work to have a few subjects that will definitely be listed in any biography written about me as muses that helped me create something that was out of the ordinary.

So who makes a good muse for me? I've been asking that question a lot lately. I think if I look at the list of women I've had the good fortune to create photographs with, a pattern does seem to emerge, although with any rule, there are exceptions.

First, and a question I'm asked quite often is, where do I find potential subjects? Making a quick list of women I've photographed nude over the years, I've come up with about sixteen subjects. I very well may forgetting some I've worked with in the last 15 years. A majority of them were either friends who only modeled for me and never modeled for anyone else, or part time models who worked on a very limited basis with other photographers. The small remainder were what I would call professional models who worked successfully with many other photographers and made a good part or all of their living from modeling.

While I wouldn't say that my best photographs were always from the non professionals, I would say that of the professional models I've worked with, I only really made a great long lasting connection that yielded extraordinary art with just two of them. And I'll admit it was truly great work. One of them was local for at least the majority of the time and, in actuality, I would say was only semi professional in that she was also an actress, yoga and dance and fitness instructor while we worked together. The other model would fly in a few times a year to create. I'm not mentioning names simply because I don't wish to hurt anyone's feelings.

But I would say the non professional models have, over the years, made an equally significant contribution. On the whole perhaps a greater one. I think because my relationships with them are more casual and long term, there seems to be a connection that I don't have when I simply hire people to model for me. I'm fine with hiring people. I've been hired myself for many things in my life, but sometimes there is a different dynamic to the situation when it's a strictly business relationship instead of one that is being done because the parties involved want to create something truly amazing. It's not about the payday, it's about the work.

So yes, once in a while I have a tremendous experience photographing someone minutes after I meet her, but that's extremely rare. One of my favorite photographs of all time is the second frame I exposed shortly after I met one particular model. Is it because we just managed to dial into each other so quickly? Was it something I said to evoke the emotion and feeling I wanted for the image. Hard to say at this point.

There have been other times when 20 minutes into a several hour shoot where I've hired someone, I can just tell, I can't wait for it to be over. The chemistry isn't there and I know I'm not going to be happy with the photographs. I kick myself for spending the money on a wasted shoot, but sometimes it literally is rolling the dice. I always struggle with the business side of art. Sometimes mixing the two just kills any sort of creative spark that might be there if the situation were more about the art and less about making a living.

But working with non professional models has it's own set of challenges. Since most of the women who end up shooting with me have never done anything like this before, it's a delicate process that can take years from the "Wow, she's interesting. I wonder what she would be like to photograph, to actually shooting." But in that time, we learn about each other's philosophies on art and the world and human nature and men and women, so by the time we do decide to create something, there is a fairly significant connection. Those are my favorite collaborations. Sadly, too few and far between much of the time.

And I think at the end of the day, that's what I look for in a muse. I've had stunning women in front of my camera, but because they didn't inspire me on an emotional or mental level, the pictures suffered. Photography can be like a dance and when we're stepping on each other's toes or listening to different music, the results are never what I hope they will be. There are a lot of beautiful women in the world, and I've been fortunate enough to create inspiring images with some of them, but if I am not engaged by something beneath the surface, it's an exercise in frustration.

I guess that is what makes art special. It isn't easy. But there's nothing I'd rather do than keep trying to make it.

Overwhelmed

I am so humbled by what is happening in my life these days. I was just at an gorgeous art event in a grandeous space where a most gracious host continually introduced me to his amazing beautiful friends as, "This is Billy. He is a great phtographer." I felt like I was in an episode of Sex and the City.

I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and love that I have been getting from my work in the last few weeks. Here's one example of an email I got about the June postcard:

Okay, positively, this latest postcard you sent out is without a doubt my most favorite photo in the entire galaxy and beyond, and will remain so for all of my lifetimes.

I always create what means something to me. What inspires me. I'm so gratified when other people I respect find something in it that inspires them as well. I am humbled by their kind words. And there have been a lot of kind words directed toward me recently.

Every once in a while I feel like I can fly. Tonight is one of those nights!

Thank you.

Momentum Building

Today I was asked by yet another major art collector if I could make a giant print for him of the June postcard photograph of Melissa in the cemetery. This will be the biggest print I've ever made of any of my photos. I haven't really had the chance to tell anyone about it today, so I guess I'll say it here.

A few months ago I decided to really make a point to follow my gut. I'm making decisions about how I present my photography and how I am continuing to make new photography based on what I feel deep down is my own truth. It's not that I wasn't following my gut in the past, it's just that I was listening to it but being a little slow to act on it. Not any more.

I've always enjoyed a certain amount of praise for my work, but something has happened in the last few weeks that is unlike anything I've ever experienced before. I feel like I've been standing in a dimly room with my work and suddenly someone has turned a light on in there and people are noticing it.

All this has done is simply fueled my fire even more than it has been in the past. Some of the decisions that I've been making have been difficult ones, but the "follow your bliss" method of living seems to be generating rewards beyond what I could have imagined. It's been hard work, getting this Billy Sheahan Photography machine up and running at the level it is now. There are more challenges and frustrations to overcome every day. But I'm doing it.

Yes, I will be making new and amazing art very soon and I will continue to push it out into the world. It's the only thing I can do.

Quelques Mots de Français

If you don't speak French, click here to translate to this entry to English

Aujourd'hui, j'écris en français. J'ai un nouveau clavier français de Apple que j'apprends à utiliser qui a tous les caractères français de langue. Hier, j'ai commencé mes classes françaises de niveau trois à l'alliance Français Chicago. C'a été une lutte difficile pour apprendre une nouvelle langue, même une aussi belle que celle.

Mais c'est tout très bon. Le mois prochain, le beau Morgan et moi voyagent à Paris. Nous avons signé un bail pour un appartement là. Nous sommes très excités au sujet des photographies que nous prendrons là.

Avant que nous partions, il y a des photos à prendre ici Chicago en semaines à venir. Le samedi, j'ai une prise de photo avec deux le nouveau models je ne travaillé pas avec précédemment. Ce sera une prise fine nue d'art. C'a été plusieurs années puisque j'ai eu deux beaux corps à la photographie en même temps. Je pense que ce sera une expérience merveilleuse pour tous les nous. Les modèles s'appellent Elizabeth et Melissa.

Je passe en revue toujours les belles photos que j'ai faites avec Frances le week-end passé. C'était un sentiment merveilleux à créer comme cela encore ! Je prendrai plus de photos comme cela à l'avenir.

Merci de lire mon premier blog écrit en français. Je dois toujours consulter un dictionnaire quand j'écris, mais je vais lentement mieux. Et j'apprends lentement le clavier français aussi bien !

Amitiés et bonne nuit !

Great Shoot! Great Week!

Sorry it's been a while since the last post. And I don't have time to write much now, except to say that things are going very well. Had a wonderful dinner with one of Chicago's most amazing art collectors last week and he was very interested in my work. We talked about life and philosophies of living and art and the beauty of women.

Yesterday, I had an amazing art shoot with a stunning woman named Frances. We're still going through the images, but they really turned out beautifully. It's been a while since I've had a stunning figure in front of my lens and it was so good to do that again. I've been neglecting that part of my art and it felt so good to create! Thank you Frances!

And summer is here in Chicago.

And Morgan and I will be leaving for our apartment in Paris in less than a month!

La vie est belle !

An Inconvenient Truth

Not sure how I'm going to tie this one into photography, but we'll see when I get to the bottom if I have or not.

I rarely have time to see movies anymore. Something I used to love to do, but sitting still for two hours just doesn't seem to fit into my life. But I've been wanting to carve out a little time to see what I had heard was a very important film. I finally did and it is.

Everyone who lives on this planet should see An Inconvenient Truth. Really. We all need to see this film. It may affect us all. It will certainly affect our children.

A couple of initial observations. As I sat in the darkness watching Al Gore make his case for the reality of global warming I became very sad that this man is not our President. I was not a huge fan of his during the 2000 election. I didn't agree with all of his politics, but he seemed like a decent enough man to run the country.

After seeing this film, I can honestly say that he's a greater man than I gave him credit for. It's too bad that the Democratic Party molded him into a boring awkward candidate. He may be a bit of a nerd, but he's not boring. At least when he's talking about something he feels passionate about. He deserves more credit and certainly does not deserve the amount of ridicule he has weathered over the years.

The movie is basically a power point presentation. Now I hate power point presentations. But Al has been giving this presentation for a couple of decades, more than 1,000 times by his own count, and he's a damn good storyteller. It didn't hurt that he was using Apple's Keynote which is far easier on the eyes than Microsoft's PowerPoint.

As the movie evolves we see Mr. Gore giving his presentation, intercut with stories and clips of his life which help to illustrate why he has dedicated his life to trying... trying and in most cases perhaps until now, not succeeding in educating as many people as possible about the very real problem of global warming.

Here's the second observation and perhaps the most tragic. Al Gore is as much a man of science as President George W. Bush is not. There is an intellectual chasm between these two men. Watching the film I began to shake my head wondering how much different this country would be if Mr. Gore had "won" the election in 2000. We probably would be concentrating on more important things than gay marriage or flag burning and perhaps we wouldn't even be involved in the civil war in Iraq. No, perhaps we would be worrying more about for the first time in our history we are in perilous danger of changing the climate of earth to the degree that life will be very different, even unpleasant for most and deadly for others.

Here's the simple broad stroke. The increasing levels of carbon dioxide that we are putting into the atmosphere since the 1960s will continue to melt the ice at both of the earth's poles and not only raise the temperature of the planet enough to melt glaciers and the snow on even the highest mountain tops that provide water to a great deal of the earth's population, but the oceans will rise to a level that millions of people's homes will be underwater. Not only Florida and New York and San Francisco, but huge parts of countries all over the world.

It stops being an issue of whether or not we as a nation can afford to fill the gas tanks of gas guzzling SUVs, but whether we want to be responsible as humans for changing the climate of the earth enough that we will actually begin to kill people in other countries when their fresh water supplies disappear. It's not an exaggeration. We are on the verge of that being a reality.

So go see this film and perhaps you'll be shaking your head as you leave the theater like I was, wondering whether this most unscientific Administration will ever admit that our energy policies are arrogant, shortsighted and immoral. I doubt they ever will.

Looking at the photographs of glaciers and mountain tops melting is very real proof. Undeniable anymore.

President Al. It's a damn shame.

Getting Noticed

This is probably going to be a frustrating blog for you faithful readers, because I can't give away the ending.... at least not in public. But it seems like I'm showing up on the radar these days. Twice this week I've heard from major art collectors in Chicago.

My philosophy has always been that good work gets noticed, and so all my life I've been quietly been working away creating what I think is important to me and just concentrating on making beautiful, moving photography. Even though I've been giving more attention to the business side of late, the promotion, advertising and recruiting of new models, I probably haven't been giving that as much time as it requires just because it seems like three hours a night of sleep is no longer heathy for me. So something's got to give.

And what has been going is that I'm not promoting myself nearly as much as I should. The monthly postcards are good, and I'll be honest, just that small, once a month mailing does seem to keep me in the mix at least a little bit. The exhibition at Echo Gallery here in Chicago is due to come down any day now (they seem to be leaving it up because it's still generating interest), and that has put my work out in a public setting again for the first time in a long time.

My greatest wish through all of this would be that the work would speak for itself. I'm a typical artist in that I'm not much of a salesman. And that hurts me because the photography is so good that if I were to shine more of a spotlight on it, I would easily capture the attention of more people.

But at the same time it's been fun this year to see the collectors discovering this "new emerging photographer" and talking with them about my work and having them really understand it. I see how collectors get excited about getting in on the ground floor and buying my work, hoping that it will increase in value in time. It's very exciting to feel all of that positive energy. The word of mouth and buzz seems to be gathering a nice head of steam.

So I'm afraid I'll have to close this entry with only this purposely vague statement that I'm on the radar now. WAY on the radar.